Tuesday, May 19, 2009

An Open Letter To The Boogeyman In My Closet

Dear Boogeyman,

While you're in there, would you mind separating my button down shirts from my tees? At some point, they got all mixed together and it's become quite the hassle trying to get dressed in the morning.

Thanks so much,
Shawn

15 comments:

ReformingGeek said...

Dear Shawn,
Take your meds, you OCD Geek.

Yours in Terror,
Bogeyman

Shawn's Button Down Shirts. said...

Dear Shawn,

Please dont do that. I dont want creepy bogeyman fingers on my round bits. Seperate us yourself, you creep.

Thanks,

Your shirts.

Shawn said...

Reforming: Trust me, anyone who knows me would laugh at the idea of me being an OCD neat freak.

My shirts: No, you know, that's fine. Maybe I'll just toss you out. There's entirely too much purple in my wardrobe, anyway.

Winky Twinky said...

I don't know about *your* closet monster, but mine already informed me that he does NOT separate, sort, or iron clothing....he also refuses to pick things up... So, I ask you.. just what are they good for anyway???

Marissa said...

Boogeyman is having a one-man frat party in there and wearing your Fruit of the Looms over his head. He mentioned something about high heels and pantyhose in there too. Explain.

Shawn said...

Winky: Yeah, well they have a hell of a union. It's amazing they can even be bothered to scare people anymore.

Marissa: Uhhh, it was for a part in a local stage production...no, really...

Phillipia said...

Dear Shawn,
Just wanted you to know the Boogeyman has officially left your closet for mine...something about cuddling with Teddies...

mama-face said...

dear open letters.

the boogeyman is not real. That is what I tell my son everyday.

I sure wish he'd color code my closet though. if he were real that is.

The Offended Blogger said...

That is no boogeyman, that is your wife's big, bla...

...oops!

Nevermind. :)

Shawn said...

Phillipia: That's just great. Although I guess I can't blame him.

Mama-face: Yes, yes, we have to assure children of that "fact", but we adults know the truth.

Chelle B.: My wife's big, bla...grrrr, if I had a wife I'd be angry. And if I have a wife that I don't know about then I'm even more angry.

Funnyrunner said...

what about colors? He (she?) needs to put like colors together WITHIN the button-downs and Ts...

When I was a kid and ever fearful of the monster under the bed, my evil big brother once crawled into my room and made noises under my bed, thereby scaring the shit outta me.

shopgirl101 said...

Send your Boogie Man my way when you're done!

Barney the Dinosaur said...

What's wrong with the color purple?

Shawn said...

Funnyrunner: That's not evil, that's what big brothers are programmed to do.

Brooke: You make him sound ready for Dancing With the Stars.

Barney: Sorry, that was not thought out. My apologies to Alice Walker as well.

Nan-Nan said...

What's all the fuss about some guy dancing in your closet Shawn? Maybe you should take care of your own shirts, give him a little more room to bust a move in there.....

We don't have worry about him here. The Boogeyman doesn't come to Oklahoma. Closets are full of folks hiding from the tornadoes.:)